Epic Fail…don’t call your little sis a dork


So embarrassing! This week’s Fun Friday post is about the Epic Fail. Surely, most of my YA Storyteller gal pals will be writing about faux pas from their wide cast of book characters. I thought about that. There’d be a few things that I could share about Colby being awkward or Jumper being, well Jumper.

However, as I start to think on the subject, I realize that my own life’s experiences carry far more failures than any of my characters. No one has ever accused me of being Miss Perfect…or Miss Poised…or well, you get the point.

One particular incident comes to mind as it is one of my sister’s favorites. I know this because she trots it out anytime we attend a banquet or family dinner together. Oh yeah, it’s great entertainment for the whole table (*rolling my eyes).

Anyway, it happened about thirteen or so years go. I had joined a high-powered professional club that met 2 and a half hours away in the big city. High level group…all black business suits.

jumperOn the infamous day, I was to be one of several young adults that were being honored for achievements during the group’s monthly luncheon. My hubby couldn’t go, and I didn’t want to go alone, so I conned my little sister into attending with me.

She was a school teacher fresh out of college at the time. Now, this was the late 90s/early 00s and at least in our area of the country there was a certain (ahem) fashion trend running rampant in the classroom. All the teachers were wearing these denim jumpers. Remember those? They’d typically have some sort of embroidered embellishments at the top like pencils and rulers or cats playing with yarn. It was also “fashion” to have some sort of playfully patterned turtleneck under said jumper that coordinated with the design.

Anyway, I made a point to order my sister that she was not to wear such a thing. I had nightmares of her with a whole closet of them. I believe I used the word dork a few times. “These are very important people. You cannot embarrass me,” I explained to her over and over again. I’ll be the first to admit, I was being a jerk of a big sis, but I didn’t leave it there. I continued to lecture her the whole 2.5 hours there…moving on from her dress to tell her how to act, what to say.

We get there, and we both look very professional in our black dress suits. She is actually a great conversationalist which really took me by surprise because to me she was still the bratty little sister that broke all my toys. When did she grow up?

I was so happy, everything was going so well. And then…then I reached out and accidentally knocked over a huge, full server of salad dressing. It spread across the table drenching everything, stopping just short of the others at the table who jumped up suddenly yelling and pulling everyone’s attention to my blunder.

I never lectured my sister on not being a dork again.